30 Days of Thankfulness

Photo Source: http://kerryskronicles.blogspot.com/2011/10/building-inspiration.html

This is the beginning of a new blogging series, if you will, which will focus on being thankful each day. I have been inspired to do this for a few different reasons. The main reason is because I am having a really hard time going into the home stretch of Josh being gone. Some might think that it should be easier because the end is in sight but it actually works the opposite way for me! I’m so tired of this time of separation and it’s hard to maintain a good attitude when I just want the remaining time to pass quickly so we can get it over and done with. It’s a struggle to have a positive attitude each day when I anticipate how much better it will be to have Josh back. As his return comes closer it’s hard to look forward to the future and not feel bitter and angry that I can’t have those things now! Yes, it’s an opportunity for growth for both of us but married people are meant to be together and I’m just really ready for that to happen for us once again! We both are. So, as a way of dealing with my frustration and struggle attitude until Josh returns, I’m going to spend 30 days writing about something I am thankful for each day.

I think we all go through times where it’s a challenge to be thankful and positive because our current situation is full of difficulties and growing pains. I don’t want to use that as an excuse for having a bad attitude but I don’t think there’s anything wrong in acknowledging that it happens! It doesn’t mean we like feeling this way or are refusing to do anything about it.

Sometimes we just need someone to agree with what’s on our mind and just outright say “this sucks” not so we can feel justified in our misery but just so that we know what we’re feeling is ok, it’s not wrong. It’s very kind when people try to respond to our difficulties by reminding us of the positive things in life but there comes a point when hearing it from others just doesn’t help because we’ve become numb from our own pain. Our attitude is derived from our thoughts and experiences so until we can bring ourselves to be genuinely thankful and positive, real change isn’t going to happen. However, it is great to have people to help you along in that process and give you ideas! I’m just trying to say that the words of others isn’t what changes our attitude; it’s believing these words for ourselves and letting them transform our attitude from the inside out.

Sorry I went on a bit of a venting rampage. It’s been a really tough few days! Tomorrow I will write my first thankfulness entry and you can guarantee I will mean every word of it, not because I’m forcing fluffy positivity but because it’s one simple thing that I can hold onto to bring me the hope I need to get through one more day.