Critical thinking...
This term may be new for some of you, but for the most part I think everyone knows what it is. Up until a year ago I didn't. I did things because I had always done them that way. That was the way I was taught or that's how I saw other people do it. I'm not saying I didn't put a lot of thought into things, it just didn't go deeper than the surface. My father spent a lot of time trying to open me up to this concept but it's one of those things that unless it clicks for me, you're talking to a brick wall. I don't know why I work that way, not being able grasp the concept, as it were. It's the way I have always been but it's also one of the ways I'm trying to grow in. Being in a relationship, a deep committed relationship, has been quite an eye opener for me. Sam, as you can imagine, has invested so much into my life and although I could rant for pages about how amazing she is and how important she is to me, I'll try to stick with this one example :)
One aspect of critical thinking comes in the form of conversation. You can be friends with someone, you can be best friends with someone. You have people that know you well and you have acquaintances. You have family and friends in varying degrees of relationship and for many different reasons you can lose touch with people. It doesn't mean they aren't important to you, sometimes that's just the way life is. With all the people you know, how often do we talk about deep issues, intellectual things. One of my friends put a quote on Facebook the other day that said
"
Great minds discuss IDEAS. Average minds discuss EVENTS. Small minds discuss PEOPLE."
How often do we get to the heart of issues with our friends or talk about meaningful things instead of gossip? Do you know the people in your life well enough to be comfortable enough conversing about some of those deep things? This is something I'm working towards. I'm a long way from being half way there but the process has been started. Sam and I talk about anything and everything, sometimes our conversation isn't very intelligent (mostly I'm to blame for that ;) but there is always substance to what we say in any given day. To be able to branch out and talk about the heart of the issues around us is an amazing thing. It helps me think beyond the surface of my relationships.
Another aspect of critical thinking Sam has opened me up to is spending habits. I'm not going to lie, I'm impulsive. I've always had enough money to pay the bills and food but I've never really sat down and come up with a spending plan... or should I say saving plan? Sam on the other hand has been a student for 6 years, plain and simple she can be frugal. Now I don't say that in a bad way because in this example opposites do attract. We balance each other out perfectly in this way but it's taken quite a bit of work to get there. I have changed my shopping habits a ton, that's not to say I don't have moments of... relapse, but that's where Sam comes in and helps me out! In the opposite scenario I try to give Sam logical (she responds really well to logic), thought out and practical reasons why it's okay to spend a little bit more money on something. I realize I am only explaining the perfect situation, it isn't always that easy but it's something we both work on.
That is the very short list of some of the critical aspects I have been working on. I couldn't do it without Sam though. She loves and respects me in so many different ways. That is one of the most amazing aspects of marriage, to have someone lovingly lift you up and help you grow in the areas you struggle in. Reflecting like this makes me miss her so much!
