Josh's First Blog

Just a note: Sam picked this photo for the entry because it somewhat captures Josh's expression towards blogging; a combination of

excitement/anticipation mingled with "I really don't know what I'm doing here". 

The photo is from when we went suit shopping for Kelsey & Jesse's wedding.

Well, the long anticipated Josh start is now upon you… don’t get to excited though, this isn’t necessarily “my thing”. What I mean is, ya this is going to be fun, buuuuuut this is so much more Sam’s forte that her awesome vocabulary and writing skills will very much overshadow anything I could bring to bear. Be that as it may, I have to try ;)

So, after some thoughtful reflection (I will expand on that later) I decided what my first topic for blogging would be… marriage. For all the un-married people out there don’t stop reading just yet, this is going to be packed with lots of funny stories, “adjustments” (as it were), and of course reasons why marriage isn’t always so… shall we say fun… Sam just told me I should add that its mostly fun and almost never not fun, not that I meant for it to seem like it was mostly not fun… I would say a 96 fun to 4 not fun. Anyway, lots to share and I promise you’ll enjoy parts if not all of it!

This has taken me a long time to write out. I explained to Sam that I really wanted to do this blog with her; I also informed her that just because my enthusiasm was high did not necessarily mean there would be a high turnout of posts. Writing for me is a “have to be in the mood for” kind of thing, whereas for Sam, it’s very much different. I have literally sat and watched her write up a full post in less than 15 minutes… now I think it’s a combination of amazing typing skills (and man do they fly) and very coherent thought. She does a lot of reflecting and organizing in her mind, enabling her to write a blog in her head and then essentially just putting it down in writing. What I’m trying to say is Sam intimidates me. I mean, ya she has 5 years of post-secondary on me and has developed some amazing skills but man oh man is she good! Okay okay okay, I’m seriously going to blog instead of ramble.

Two words, conflict resolution. Conflict resolution with co-workers, friends and family did not prepare me for the marriage side of the house. Living intimately with someone really brings out the nitty gritty in every aspect of your relationship, regardless of how prepared you think you are. I've been there. Sam and I together make an especially interesting combination. Sam is a woman; she is sensitive and more easily hurt them I am. Don’t get me wrong, I love how sensitive Sam is, she helps me be a more considerate and compassionate person but it can also have negative connotations. I, being a man can be less sensitive, not necessarily on purpose, it just kind of …happens. I think the reason it happens isn’t really that complicated, I’m flawed. I get lazy, I forget things and in doing that it hurts her. Learning to live with someone, no matter how long you have known them or how well you know them, is really hard. It’s an adjustment, one that is very challenging but so worth it! The things we can turn into really big deals and get upset about sometimes amazes me when I step back and take a look at it. We live and we learn!

Sliver Pie. Sam has talked about this in an earlier blog but to really understand how it works I think you need to see it from my perspective, the sliver. Who likes pie? Everyone. Who would like only a tiny small sliver of said pie? Ya that’s what I thought. Everyone likes pie and a good healthy portion at that (maybe I shouldn’t have used the word healthy lol). If we transfer this idea to our bed hopefully you can get the picture. Sam has almost quite literally the whole bed. She needs that much room in order to get a good sleep and I have to be honest with you, most of the time it isn’t a huge sacrifice for me to have the sliver. I’m one of those guys that when my head hits the pillow I could count down from 5 and pass out. That and I don’t mind sleeping with only my body width of space. However, there have been some nights were, as soon as I roll away from Sam onto the side of my body facing the wall, she stretches out even farther! So I don’t even have my body width in which to claim bed space with, and then I am quite stuck. Why don’t I just push her over a little bit you say? Well, the thing is Sam doesn’t really sleep very well, it takes her a long time to sleep and if she wakes up in the middle of the night it takes that much longer just to fall back asleep. So most of the time I just suck it up, that’s part of marriage, you give a lot and you get a lot back!

So that’s my kick off, I know it’s not super long but there will be more to add as the days go by. There is so much in our lives we look forward to sharing with everyone and this is a very easy way to do it!

-J-